If a fellow believer hurts you, go and tell him- work it out between the two of you. If he listens you've made a friend. If he wont listen, take one or two others along so that the presence of witnesses will keep things honest and try again. If he still wont listen , tell the church. If he wont listen to the church you'll have to start over from scratch, confront him with the need for repentance, and offer again God's forgiving love.
Matthew 18:15-17 (MSG)
This is what the Bible says about what do with conflict. I have to be honest and say that I would usually give up after taking along witnesses or to be even more honest I will tell you that I have even skipped the middle step, sometimes even the first and gone straight for the third. Its not pretty, I am definitely still learning about how best to deal with conflict, but these verses give me a framework to work within. These verses are also convicting, they seem to paint a picture in which we don't get to give up and live with conflict in our Christ family, in fact it seems that we have to keep trying, keep working on breakthrough until there is resolution. I will honestly tell you I have never walked through all these steps got to the end and started again because there was no resolution, I have given up. I have decided that obviously its not meant to be and moved on. However like I told you I am learning to grow in dealing with conflict and I will now have to go back and try to resolution, no many how many times I have to go through the steps to get there.
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