There's no place I'd rather be...

Movie NIght

There is a song that we sang a lot with our team and one of the lines of the song is "there is no place I'd rather be, than here in your love", this is a huge statement. This is a line that I was stuck on for most of my trip, while lying in the hospital I was asked, is there any other place you would rather be and surprisingly I was able to answer with 100% sincerity that no, there was no place I would rather be. I didn't want to be at home, or even not sick in an African hospital because even in those moments of terribleness, or those times I was terrified, or to sick to stand on my own I knew that I was in those moments fully in God's love and in his plan. I knew that it was no accident that I was sick, it wasn't a surprise, that it wouldn't ruin everything that God had a purpose and I just needed to rejoice and pray that God would bless me enough to show me some of the fruit of my obedience.

Quick break from ministry

There was a game we played a lot on this trip its called the thankfulness game, basically at times we were frustrated, angry, sad, hungry, and even sometimes when we were happy someone would decide it was time to play the thankfulness game. During this game usually the person who decides people have to play it shout out a number that everyone has to reach, for example 10 then everyone has to say 10 things they are thankful for. I'll be honest and tell you that in the early days of Kenya even I struggled greatly in this game getting 10 things I was thankful for. But as time progressed God changed my attitude and I started to delight over playing the thankful game myself and listening to my students play it, I loved to here everyone worshiping God with their words of thankfulness.

Finally I finally thankful for being 22 almost 23 years old. My age is something that I have always struggled with, when I was younger I wanted to be older and be an adult. Now I spend every birthday upset because I feel like my life is too quickly slipping away, that every year I never accomplish enough. Just recently I have truly begun to be thankful that I am who I am, when I look back at my 18 &19 year old self there is no way I would EVER want to go back and relive those years. They were confusing and hard because I desperately wanted to know who I was but at the same time I was terrified of who that person I was. I was worried that I would have a calling that was bigger than I thought I could handle, I was terrified that I was unlovable. These fears caused me to not trust anyone, to never let anyone one in, I was terribly insecure and to be honest fairly miserable but I didn't know it. I can still see God in that time and what He was doing in me and I am thankful but I am even more thankful that I constantly changing and getting away from that scared little girl that I was then. Praise the Lord. So possibly for the first time in my life I am thankful for who God has made me to be in this moment. I am thankful to be ever growing older because I pray that I am also growing wiser and I hope that I am ever growing closer to my Abba

My warrior co-leaders, you would never believe that things we walked through together this month and I am so grateful to have been blessed with them.