Messy

I am a mess, but its a beautiful thing. I still have the African dirt under my nails, I still have strange and mysterious illnesses, I constantly go back and forth about whether I am happy to be back in Georgia. I repeatedly find myself getting frustrated, angry, joyful, weepy, and excited about God. I am just a wreck. This trip wrecked me.

Jeremy, me and Jess at a random waterfall

This trip was hard, every single one of our participants felt it. As a leader team Jess, Jeremy felt it, the darkness that our team was battling was intense,  most days (if things had gone according to plan) our ministry schedule was also supposed to be gruelling. This was how things looked without counting in the month of multiple illnesses the constantly seemed to be plaguing our team.
It would be easy for me to look back and cry because things were hard, or to feel discouraged because all my kids didn't come back loving Africa. It would be so easy for me to go home and think that this trip was a failure. But instead I honestly feel like celebrating because one, we made it back, two I can't help but feel excited for the future. There is no reason that we should have had the month that we just had without reason, we were being prepared by God and Satan wanted to stop the good work that God was doing on our team.
I am eagerly awaiting the coming weeks and months to see the fruit that I know will be born out of what happened this month.
Not only were we tested and we made it out, I saw miracles happen in everyone of the participants on my team, I heard the voice of the Lord constantly whispering to me of His love for me, I got to live in Africa. again.


Finally I truly got to learn again that even with everything that happened there is no place I would rather be than in God's love. So if he said go relive this month I would do it without a second thought, so now I wait on his next instructions. I know that they will be good, no matter how challenging and scary I may first think them to be. God is good, all the time.

as many people as we could get on the bed... it was good times

some of the team sitting outside our house